so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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