i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Come see our sink grown plant.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Randomize
