i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Randomize
