His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
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