You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Swine flu is the new snow day.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
