Got a toothbrush?
I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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