so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Randomize
