he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
