YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Randomize
