I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
