Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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