KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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