you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
