Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Randomize