I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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