and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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