Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
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