I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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