My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
