i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Randomize
