hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
