I think scott just propositioned me for sex
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
