i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
