careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
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