Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Randomize
