Midget sex pt 2 tonight
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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