that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
