But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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