is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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