i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
