GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
