Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize
