I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Be still, my beating vagina.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
