i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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