It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Holy shit dude........stairs
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