I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
How does one acquire holy water?
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
