Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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