So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
