fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
