Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
