If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize
