I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
