Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
