It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Randomize
