Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Randomize
