Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
