my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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