You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
