so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
