thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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