is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
