Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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